My mom is so ghetto

This is a convo. I had with Necie today:
Denice Montgomery
:yep. i have to clean house, we are having the 50 and over group from the hood over tomorrow nite for Mexican fiesta. I hate cleaning
Amber Montgomery
:the hood?
Denice Montgomery
:yep, lacey groves hood...LOL
Amber Montgomery
:your so ghetto mom
Denice Montgomery
:I know, you get it honest

Moseley, you shouldn't be giving gifts like these out on your own birthday.

1960

Am I 15 or 45?

1968

Flippin' Out

1974

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!

1980

If I'm being honest with myself, I'd say this is the most true to life. Look at that hair! No Chi's. 

1984

Please don't light a match near me.

1990

There are no words.

2000

Now I graduated in 1999. I don't remember anybody looking like this.

should i introduce myself

Yes yes I'm back on the internets! I'm still in Africa but BUT I have wireless internet, which is like so weird to have in Africa, but I've got it peeps. I will be back in the states on the 29th, then it is on people thats right I will be blogging again. I have not watched the Olympics, I know its like such a disappointment in my life right now, if I only had a TV. I do agree with Sass tho, those swimmer boyz are hawt, that might have to be our new sport along with the beloved tennis...

Lets see I'm trying to think if there has been anything entertaining happening here lately. Oh wait ha this was funny to me. We went to the grocery the other day and there was a spin class going on under the covered area in front of the store. They were playing the music SO loud, and like at one point they were biking to evanescence...really. The instructor had this crazy bleach blonde hair and this spandex outfit on. I have no clue why they were in front of the grocery but it was awesome. Here is a pic:

Thank You For Being a Friend

Now this is news. Nothing says you've made it like competing with a Zbornak, Petrillo, Neyland and Devereaux. You're in great company, Michael!

"EOnline: August 19, 2008

Mark Spitz has been vanquished. But not so Dorothy, Rose, Blanche and Sophia.

Michael Phelps' Spitz-sinking swim on Saturday elevated NBC to its best ratings on the once-mighty, now-dead night in about a generation.

Still, the golden boy of the Beijing Games couldn't topple The Golden Girls, which held on to its title as NBC's most-watched Saturday-night show of the last 18 years.

Overall, NBC's first full week of Olympic action was ratings gold, with the network scoring the most lopsided Nielsen wins in more than 20 years.

Through last night, NBC said, the Beijing Games were averaging 29.6 million prime-time viewers, up 13 percent over the 2004 Athens Games.

Add in the viewers watching table tennis, kayaking, etc., on MSNBC, USA and other NBC sister networks, and 200 million people overall tuned in the Summer Games' first 11 days, NBC said.

Network sports chief Dick Ebersol credited the surge in interest to "the mystery of China," and the success of U.S. atheletes, led by Phelps.

A Phelps race, women's gymnastics and beach volleyball combined to average 34 million viewers for last Tuesday's Olympic card, which finished No. 1 in the latest Nielsen Media Research rankings.

In the silver-medal position was Saturday's Olympic coverage, which averaged 31.6 million prime-time viewers, and featured Phelps' final swim of the games.

The climactic race earned Phelps his eighth gold medal of this Olympics, surpassing Spitz's 36-year-old record, and earned NBC its biggest number on the night since a Feb. 24, 1990 episode of The Golden Girls ("Twice in a Lifetime") averaged 32 million viewers.

While Phelps came up shy of toppling Dorothy, et al, he did surpass the Feb. 24, 1990 episode of Empty Nest, a Golden Girls spinoff, which "only" averaged 31.4 million viewers.

Apparently before uncovering the Golden Girls rating, NBC, in fact, awarded Phelps its Nielsen gold medal in a press release that trumpeted the swimmer's victory over Empty Nest.

In the end, not even The Golden Girls could match the 40 million that NBC averaged for the 11 p.m. half-hour that featured the decisive Phelps race."

So you know the 6 degrees game? Well apparently Michael (Phelps. Who did you think I was talking about? Jordan? J. Fox? Dukakis?) is friends with 14 of my Facebook friends. That's only 1 DEGREE!!!! I am so famous.

When shopping at Publix last (post-bow) I saw that Colgate Total was on sale. So I bought 2. Yippee! However, now it feels like I've rubbed a piece of Big Red gum over my teeth. Cinnamon? Really? Who in the world knew they still made cinnamon toothpaste anymore? Didn't that go out with AIM? What is this, 1985 and I'm watching The Price is Right and Close Up is being bid on by a 50-year old housewife from Topeka, Kansas, wearing an "I Want to be a Barker Beauty" homemade t-shirt? I'll survive but maybe I'll just start chewing some Red Hots. Same effect.

I am putting it in writing...Jana Kelley and Sarah McDonnell are discussing becoming world-dominating doubles partners. I'm also deliberating joining the Y. That would be where we dominate. Get ready, Brentwood suburban mothers! It's ON!

Welcome back, ladies!

In all of my infatuation with the Olympics (see previous post, wait...posts) I almost missed a monumental event that is creeping up upon us. Monday really can't get here fast enough.

Week 1 DOWN!

So week 1 of the 2008 Olympics is finished and may I just say, GO USA!!! I've never before been so enthralled with the Olympics as I am this year. 

And I have this man to thank for it...

My favorite from this year...

Laura "The Cog" Coggin's favorite...

A National Treasure and Number 1 in Our Hearts...

Little Amazing Squirt

Ok, I'm starting to get paranoid...

Does anybody else see this "sponsored link" on the websites they check out? 

I've spotted this ad on so many of the sites I've looked at lately. It's got me worried that I need to consider bleaching.

You're from where?

Now, I took geography and had tests to judge how well I knew the countries of the world. I even had to know capitals. But last night watching the countries march into the Opening Ceremony yesterday, I have come to realize that every 2 years (Summer and Winter) countries seem to come to existence.

Here are a few that I don't believe in:
Eritrea
Nauru
Sao Tome and Principe
Tuvalu

Props to the Chinese for a great Opening Ceremony. It is quite an impressive stadium, with some awesome fireworks (I mean you invented them, didn't you?)

I'll admit it, this made me cry:

Here are my favorite fashions of the night:

Hello, America!

Cheers, Great Britain!

Bonjour, France!

Happy Birthday, Roger! The Swiss apparently read the weather report.

And a few faux pas:

What the jorts, Denmark?

Love you Rafa, but no.

Hands down, worst (Hungary):

One about which I'm not quite sure how I feel (Netherlands) I think I kind of like it:

One more look at GBR:

And America once again:

Thank you, Ralph Lauren:

I LOVE THE OLYMPICS!!!!

I am my mother?

I am turning into Kay. This is not a bad thing. However, I noticed this past weekend that either Kay has taken things from me, or I from her.

- Kay uses the term "this one" to refer to a present third party. For instance, she and my cousin are discussing our other cousin's phone habits. She is a long pause, meaning there are extremely awkward pauses when you are on the phone with her. Kay then informs my cousin that I'm the same way by saying "Well, this one is just as bad!" So in one conversation I find out that I'm bad on the phone and I've picked up a phrase from my mom (or she stole from me, which I contend.)

One of these is not like the other...

go to this page and choose Afghanistan for your country...and then tell me who is going to have a hard time on that team in their event.

EDIT: Scratch that title. Two of these are not like the other... (I didn't see the other female. I guess her head wrap blended in with the background. Sometimes the desert throws me off.)

EDIT TAKE TWO: This is an excerpt from one of their profiles: "Ahdyar trains in a loose tracksuit and headscarf, something she says she will not change to compete in the Olympics. 'I am an Afghan and a Muslim girl, and wearing a headscarf is an obligation for Muslim girls,' she said. 'I will not take off my scarf in China when I race because it is symbol of Muslim women.'"

Berge, you have something on your nose in that picture. I'd give you a tissue, but you're in South Africa. I'm sure they have them there too. Go blow.

(It looks good.)